Leading Ladies: Eve

Eve was the prototype of women. When God designed the female species, He made Eve exactly how He wanted woman to be. She was perfect. She was handcrafted by God to meet the needs of man; to be his helpmeet and companion. We know that Eve, prior to sin being entered into the world, had a perfect relationship with God and a perfect relationship with her husband. Truly, she was 'living the life'. 

And then Genesis 3 happens. Eve is tempted (and lied to) by the serpent, and she partakes of the forbidden fruit, then shares in that sin with her husband. We know the rest of the story: their eyes are opened, they hide from God, and they are banished from the garden as well as cursed and plagued with a death they weren't designed for. 

From Eve, the mother of all creation, there are some valuable lessons we can learn.

1: Sin ruins relationships. 

Eve's relationship with God and with Adam was perfect. And yet, the first thing that happens after partaking of the fruit: Adam and Eve are hiding from God, and are then deceptive by not offering up why they are hiding and how they know they're naked. Deceit is an ugly characteristic for a relationship, and yet after this initial sin has taken place, that is exactly the characteristic Eve implements into her relationship with God. As for Adam, he immediately blames Eve for his sin. We know that blame and resentment are divisive components of a relationship, and yet this is how this first married couple are now treating each other. All because of this newly introduced sin.

When we let sin into our hearts and relationships, it ruins them. Truly the Deceiver recognizes that strong, godly relationships are a great asset to salvation. That is why he does his best to ruin them! He tempts us with bad attitudes, harsh words, and blame. He tempts us to be deceitful and hurtful. These things ruin relationships: relationships between parents and children, relationships between friends, relationships between husband and wife, and even relationships within the body of Christ. 

Why is it that we often hurt those the closest to us? Why is it we have the worst attitudes with them? Perhaps it is because we let our guard down. We stop trying to 'impress' and 'be on our best behavior', and instead we start letting Satan creep in a little at a time. We must guard our relationships from Satan, because he is divisive and aims to tear people apart. 

2: Sin has progression.

Why is it that Eve is tempted to partake of the forbidden fruit? Had she been staying as far away from the tree as possible, would she have likely been tempted to partake? Or does it seem to you as it does me that Eve was inching closer and closer to the tree, getting as close as she could without actually involving herself in the sin. Perhaps she only wanted to look upon the fruit, or maybe even smell the fruit. Perhaps she just wanted to see what all this fruit fuss was about! Regardless, Satan gets to her because she has availed herself to such a temptation. 

Psalm 1:1 tells us, "Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful" The progression of sin is a very real and present threat to us! As soon as we start walking past it, we're tempted to stand right in the middle of it (though still not 'partaking'), and yet, before we realize, we're sitting down in the midst of all of the wickedness and are sharers in it. 

Satan gets to us inch by inch. He makes us believe that certain things are ok, when really they are evil and wicked, and we are just lessening them in our heads to justify our actions! For example: will Satan ever be able to make us fall into the temptation of drunkenness if we never take the first sip? Will Satan ever be able deceive us into being involved in sexual immorality if we have fled from even the appearance of such? Will Satan be able to lure us into lusting after the flesh if we will stop ourselves from going into those movies (Magic Mike?) or buying those books (50 shades of whatever?) or pinning those pictures of actors (onto an "mmmm!!" board, really?). If we will distance ourselves from the appearance of sin, we will be less likely to fall into such a temptation.

Had Eve stayed as far away from that tree as possible, would it have been as easy for Satan to bait her like he did? The same goes for us. Don't be easy bait for Satan. Stay as far away from 'the line' as possible. 

3: Women have a huge influence over the men in their lives. 

Was it very difficult for Eve to convince Adam to sin with her? It doesn't appear so. We know from history and even our own experiences that men tend to behave the ways they do in order to impress women. In high school and college, for example, the boys tended to dress a certain way and talk a certain way and participate in certain things to garner the attention of the females. They bathed regularly and wore cologne and dressed to the nines so that the females around them would notice. 

With great power, ladies, comes great responsibility. 

We have the ability to make or break the men in our lives. And so, if you are in the dating pool, make the boys/men around you behave a certain way. Require the guy you date to pray before the meal you share together. Require that he open doors for you. *As a side note, if the boy doesn't respect you enough to open a door for you, chances are he won't respect you enough to not touch you inappropriately or speak to you in certain ways.* We have the ability to make the men around us better, or worse, depending on what our expectations are.

Now, does that mean we should all have unrealistic expectations for the men in our lives? Absolutely not. But it does mean that we should require a degree of godliness in the men we are around. We should praise the boys in our youth group who lead singing or pray before the congregation. We should not give the time of day to the boys who cut up and text during Bible class or worship. We should praise the boys for seeking out wholesome, modest girlfriends, instead of tearing those girls down and making fun of them for dressing 'weird'. We should praise the boys for acting mature and including the smaller boys in the youth group, instead of acting put out by the immature children hanging around. 

We can make a difference in our lives and the lives of the boys/men around us if we will not settle for less than God expects. 

 

The Thessalonian Approach

The church at Thessalonica was a good church. Paul would often admonish and encourage them, and his letters to them are quite inspiring. These first century Christians were ready for Jesus to come back, and while they had some questions about His coming, they were doing what they could so that He would find them working and being pleasing to Him.

At the end of 1 Thessalonians, Paul encourages them to "abstain from all appearance of evil (5:22, KJV)." The reason that I find this verse so fascinating is because I think it can teach us a lot about how we should live our lives today.

Perhaps you are a person who has been a Christian for a while, and maybe you don't struggle with doing evil things. You probably aren't tempted to murder, to steal, to commit adultery. You may not have a problem with drunkenness or homosexuality or sorcery. I feel like those who were living in Thessalonica didn't have a huge problem with these things either. They were desperately trying to please their God, much like we are today. And it is to those faithful brethren that Paul wrote those words:

"Abstain from all appearance of evil." 

Paul is all about pushing people to the next level, much like our Lord and Savior was (see Mt 5:21-48). These people in Thessalonica were already doing their best not to do evil things...to stay away from the things mentioned in passages like Galatians 5:19-21 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10. And for that reason, Paul urges them to go a step further. As a Christian, it is not enough to simply not participate in evil things. Instead, as holy and sanctified people of God (1 Pet. 2:9), we are to stay away from things that even have the appearance of evil.

God's chosen people must remember that they are to be different. As members of our Lord's body, we are a called out people. If we look like and act like the rest of the world, how called out are we? If we promote activities and movies and television shows and songs and artists that are unholy and immoral, how are we abstaining from the appearance of evil? When we attend concerts where illicit drugs and drunkenness prevail, dances where immodesty and lewdness abound, and movies with foul language and nudity, how are we abstaining from the appearance of evil?

Even if we are not practicing such behaviors, promoting them seems to be just as bad. As holy people of God, we must be different. We must only think on things that are pure, lovely, and of good report (Phil. 4:8). We must set our minds on things above, not dwell on things that are carnal and earthly (Col. 3:2). We must strive to be holy in all of our conduct (1 Pet. 1:15), and that leaves no room for getting caught up in things that have the appearance of evil.

It won't be easy. Choosing not to shop at certain stores, go to certain events, or listen/watch certain things may even bring us ridicule and persecution. But all of that will be temporary, and our faithfulness to God will be rewarded.

Please don't think that this post means I am calling out anyone but myself. I know myself pretty well, and with confidence I can tell you that some of the temptations that are listed in the Bible aren't things that tempt me. However, not letting myself get involved with things that have the appearance of evil--that's something that I struggle with constantly. It is my prayer that I can put this verse in the forefront of my mind, and that you can do the same, and that together, we can encourage one another to a holier lifestyle.

Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance, but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written 'Be holy, for I am holy.'     - 1 Peter 1:13-16

Christianity and Entertainment Choices

Earlier this week, I read a news article about the young actor who plays on the popular show "Two and a Half Men." The actor, 19 year old Angus T. Jones, made a video about his faith (he recently became a member of the 7th Day Adventist Group) which went viral.

There are a lot of things to say in conjunction with this story and about the things he believes, but I only want to dwell on one. The things that Jones (who has been playing on the show since he was 10 years old) need to be heard by Christians across the globe. Here's what he had to say:

"Please stop filling your head with filth." 

"People say it's just entertainment. Do some research on the effects of television in your brain and I promise you, you'll have a decision to make when it comes to what you watch on television. It's bad news." 

"A lot of people don't like to think about how deceptive the enemy is. There's no playing around when it comes to eternity. People will see us and be like, 'I can be a Christian and be on a show like Two and a Half Men.' You can't. You cannot be a true God-fearing person and be on a television show like that. I know I can't." 

"I'm not ok with what I'm learning [about] what the Bible says and being on that television show. You go all or nothing."

How is it that Christians can fool themselves into thinking that it's ok to watch certain television programs and movies? Even some of those (though it is a minority to be sure!) who are in Hollywood can see that certain things are filth. And yet, I see Christians on a daily basis promoting shows like Glee (homosexual agenda much?), The Secret Life of the American Teenager (pre-marital sex), How I Met Your Mother (a show all about pre-marital sex and alcohol), and others. What Jones had to say was correct: what you watch does have an affect on you. If you are putting filth in, what does your heart look like? How much impurity can you ingest until you aren't pure anymore?!

One reason this is such a huge deal to me is because it's something I've struggled with, and still do to be honest. It's hard not to become calloused. It's hard not to justify it. It's hard not to get swept away in all of the fads and crazes. It's hard to be set apart, yet that's exactly what God expects of His children.

"Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, because it is written 'Be holy, for I am holy'." 1 Peter 1:13-16

We should not continue to infiltrate our minds with things that we once did--in our ignorance. Now that we are holy--set apart--children of God, we are to do and think differently. Paul would urge those at Philippi to think/meditate on whatever things are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and of good report. If you watch something that doesn't adhere to all, yes all, of those principles, you probably shouldn't be watching it. After all, if you aren't truly holy, are you holy at all?

Being a Christian isn't about convenience. Being a Christian isn't about doing what's popular. Christianity is about being like Christ--because we bear His name. We are to walk in His footsteps (Col. 2:6), imitate His life (1 Cor. 4:16), and give up self to serve others as He would (Gal. 2:20).

Would Jesus watch what you watch? Would Jesus promote what you promote? If not, why do you?

Omission and Commission

I recently heard a man pray that we would be forgiven of our sins, and that we know we sin more often out of omission than commission. As soon as he'd uttered the words, my heart was pricked. How often do we get up on our high horses because we don't struggle with certain things?

I know that this world is full of sin, and that there are so many who struggle to abstain from sexual immorality, lying, drinking, cheating, murdering, stealing, etc. However, I find myself--more often than not--free from such temptations. To be honest, if I'm not careful I can find myself in a place of complacency.

James warned in his epistle that "to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin." I feel I can fit right into this category if I'm not watchful.

So that I don't fall into this category (and that you don't either!), I want to put before our minds a few things that the Word of God has told us are good to do. Perhaps if we can keep them at the forefront of our minds, we can abstain from this sneaky type of sin.

1: Visit orphans and widows in their trouble (James 1:27)

2: Give to the Lord's Work (1 Cor. 16:1-2)

3: Teach others about Christ (Matthew 28:19-20)

4: Fill yourself with the teachings of Jesus (Eph. 5:18, Col. 3:16, 2 Tim. 2:15)

5: Seek out erring members (James 5:19-20)

6: Pray for the church and for opportunities to serve (1 Thess. 5:17)

7: Feed the hungry, be hospitable to strangers, clothe the naked (Matt.25:35-39)

May God enable us all to do great works for Him, and to keep them ever before us so that we can sin less by way of omission.

How Do You Spend Your Time?

It is so easy to be consumed with ourselves, isn't it? With our schedules, our routines, our interests?

Solomon was a great king. When God asked Solomon what he wanted, Solomon didn't respond with wealth or fame or anything like that: no, he asked for wisdom. We all know the story: God made Solomon the wisest man to ever live, but He also blessed him with wealth and land and fame and peace within his kingdom. 

It isn't long, though, until Solomon starts building the temple. That in and of itself is a blessing because his father, David, wasn't allowed to build it. In 1 Kings 6:38 we read this:

"And in the eleventh year, in the month of Bul, which is the eighth month, the house was finished in all its details and according to all its plans. So he was seven years in building it."

Wow Solomon! You spent seven years hammering out details and making the temple perfect. We all know that Solomon's temple was highly esteemed by the people of his day and also those to come. And if we stopped there, we might be impressed too. After all, seven years is a lot of time to dedicate to God, right? 

Look at 1 Kings 7:1:

"But Solomon took thirteen years to build his own house; so he finished all his house."

Sure, building God's temple was important and it needed to be done just right....and thus seven years were taken to ensure that all was perfect. But when it came time for Solomon's own house to be built? Well, that would take more time. 

Now I'm sure that it could be the case that Solomon did nothing but prepare and build the Lord's temple, and when it came time for his own house, he let things get in the way of the project and therefore it took more time. It seems, however, that Solomon started investing more in his projects and his desires. It seems that his focus, his priorities, had shifted.

You and I must be careful not to do the same thing. It is so easy to get caught up doing our own thing. Recently, Robert and I bought a house and did the whole moving/unpacking thing. Needless to say, it was very easy to get wrapped up in that. We had things we needed to do for our house. Did I neglect serving the house of God? Probably sometimes. A better question may be do I spend as much time tending to the house of God as I do tending to my own home?

When things aren't inherently wrong, it's easy to place them above God. It's not difficult for me to look at something that the Bible deems sinful and then stay away from it. For me, it's difficult to look at something the Bible says is good (having a home, spending time with my husband, maintaining friend relationships, resting) and not overemphasizing that in my life (ie: placing it above God). 

My prayer for today is that I will spend more time serving the house of God than serving myself and my own wants. Sure, those things may not be sinful, but if I place them above doing God's will then I am sinning. 

Today, look into your own life and your own schedule. Find the things you spend the most time doing (Facebook, blogging, crafting, texting) and ask yourself: do I spend more time in these things than I do in God's word and in service to Him? If so, let's all realign our lives and our priorities so that we're being pleasing to our Father.

Lights in the World

Today's post might be different, but bear with me. I don't have a lot of time (this being PTP week and all), but I just had to share this scripture dissection with you!

"Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world." Phil. 2:14-15

First and foremost, the verse says that we are to do all things without complaining and disputing. Does that leave room for a time when it is acceptable to complain or dispute? No! In every single thing we do--enjoyable or not--we are not to complain. If someone asks us to do something: let's not complain about the work load or our busy schedule. When we are stuck cleaning up after a fellowship, let's not grumble and whine. When the line at the bank or Wal-Mart is too long, let's remember this verse, because we are to do all things without complaining.

But why?

Scripture doesn't always answer our 'whys'. Sometimes, it's the "because I said so" rule. If God says it, I either do it or don't do it (depending on what He's said) simply because HE said it. In this section of Scripture, though, we are actually given the why, and it makes so much sense to me.

As Christians (children of God who have been washed and set apart from the rest of the world), we are to look different. Paul told us not to be conformed to the world (Rom. 12:2). No, we're to look different. So go back to Philippians. In the midst of this crooked and perverse generation that we live in, we are to stand out---to be different--to shine as lights in the (dark) world. And HOW can we do that?

Do all things without complaining and disputing. 

When we stop complaining and we stop disputing, we start becoming blameless and harmless. We start letting our lights shine brighter.

This week, do your best to guard your tongue. Keep yourself from complaining and disputing. Be gentle, peaceable, and kind. Be a beacon of light in this world of darkness. By simply cutting these two things from our lives, we can mimic Christ's example more closely.

**For one more post on complaining, go here.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Deny Self

For those of you who have known me for a while, you know that my favorite drink in the entire world is Diet Coke. To me, there is nothing better than a large fountain Diet Coke from McDonald's in their styrofoam cups. I'm salivating just thinking about it. But here's the deal: it has been 42 days since my last Diet Coke. That is a HUGE deal. And let me tell you, it hasn't been easy. Those first few days were especially tough, and now it's only every now and then that I really miss them.

It's a lighthearted example, but an example of denying yourself nonetheless. I love Diet Coke, a lot, and I still wish that I could drink it, but I just don't. I don't need all of the aspartame or caffeine, and I definitely don't need to be addicted to anything other than my Savior.

In Matthew 16:24, Jesus said:

"If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me."

I looked up the greek definitions for those words, and the word for deny (aparneomai) means "to deny utterly, to disown, abstain." When it comes to being a follower of Christ, we are going to have to deny ourselves, ie: abstain from the lusts and desires that we possess, and only crave the things that Jesus desires.

Paul told the Romans that when they were baptized, their old man died and was buried, and they were raised a completely new person (Rom. 6:3-4). They weren't to continue in sin after they had been washed, because that wasn't what grace was about (v.1-2). As Cliff Goodwin said recently, "Jesus never came to save people in their sins; He came to save them from their sins."

When we were baptized, we were crucified with Christ. When we were raised, we gave up living to ourselves. Instead, our old person died, and now we are living as Christ (Gal. 2:20). I'm afraid that Christians have become pretty prideful, thinking we know more about how Jesus would live than the Holy Spirit. After all, the Holy Spirit has revealed the will of God to us, and has shown us exactly how we can live as Christ. Sadly, we ignore what the Spirit has said and decide for ourselves how to live.

But that isn't what the word deny means. When we become followers of Jesus, we give up self. Period. Just because I think it would be nice if all people were in heaven--regardless of how much sin they have allowed in their life-- doesn't mean that's the way Jesus meant it. Jesus said that the way would be narrow--which seems to suggest that there are going to be some guidelines as to who will be in heaven and who will not (Matt. 7:13-14, Luke 13:24).

I may think that all people who simply ask Jesus into their hearts should be saved, but Jesus said that it would be those who believed and were baptized that would be saved (Mark 16:16).

I may think that drinking and partying and getting drunk takes the edge off, and participating in such a trivial matter won't jeopardize my soul, but the Bible shows us otherwise (1 Cor. 6:10).

I may think that God doesn't care who I marry, even if that person is of the same sex, because God loves all people and wants all people to be happy, but God's inspired Word has told us otherwise (1 Cor. 6:9-10, 1 Tim. 1:10).

Regardless of what I think, I am not God. I do not get to decide what is good and true. I do not get to judge who does or does not get to go to heaven. What I do know is that God wants all men to be saved and to live with Him in heaven (1 Tim. 2:4). However, for any of us to be candidates for salvation, we must submit to the terms God has put in place. We aren't the ones offering salvation, so we don't get to decide the terms. Instead, we get to deny ourselves and put on Christ. Once we have put on Christ (through baptism--Gal 3:27), we go back to what Galatians 2:20 says,

"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."

If I weren't a Christian, I probably wouldn't guard my tongue as closely as I do. I would probably gossip more, and lie to get myself out of trouble. If I weren't a Christian, I probably wouldn't wake up early on Sundays. If I weren't a Christian, I would probably wear immodest clothing--because it's hot in Tennessee in the summertime! If I weren't a Christian, I would probably go off on people who make me angry, because they deserve to be treated the way they treat me.

However, because I am a Christian, I must respond how Jesus would respond. I must say things that Jesus would say. And, I must do the things that Jesus has said. I have to abstain from my fleshly, worldly desires because I am His. And, if your struggle is anger--you have to control it because you are now living as Christ. If your struggle is using profanity--you have to control it because you are speaking as Christ. If your struggle is with pornography--you have to abstain because you are now Christ's. If your struggle is with homosexuality--you have to abstain because God has said that is unacceptable.

We all struggle. We are all sinners. But if we are going to be true followers of Christ, we must all deny ourselves--of whatever ungodly desire it is that Satan has set before us. My struggle may be different than yours, but that doesn't give me the right to judge you. Your struggle may be different than mine, but that doesn't give you the right to give in to yours and claim that God wants you to do whatever you want. Jesus Christ told us, from His very lips, that we are to deny ourselves. For some, it may be easier. For some, the struggle may be much harder. But we know that God does not put on us more than we can bear (1 Cor. 10:13).

Denying yourself is hard, though. So we need patience and understanding and love from our brothers and sisters whose struggles are different than our own. But, we must not be so prideful to think that because our struggle is different or becoming more widely accepted that God will allow us to continue in sin. All Christians are required to deny self. All Christians are required to live as Christ.

It is my prayer that I will be more empathetic and loving toward those with different, sometimes harder struggles than my own, and that I will not be so prideful to think that I know better than God what constitutes as sin and what does not. Perhaps we can all pray this prayer together.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Why Worry?

When I was in high school, one of my favorite songs was by a then-popular band and the song was titled "Why Worry?" Here are the opening lines:

"Why worry? I wonder all the time, why worry? It's killing me. Forget about it."

Those words hold a lot of truth, though I don't think I paid much attention to them back then. In my adult life (aka the year that I've been married and away from home and living on my own), I've noticed that I spend a lot of time worrying. Recently, I heard a sermon that started off in a very thought-provoking way. Stan Butt, Jr. was the speaker, and he said that there are a lot of things that are talked about in Scripture that Christians just shrug off because "everyone does it". One such sin is worrying.

The Bible tells us plainly, "Be anxious for nothing" (Phil. 4:6), and "Do not worry" (Matt. 6:25), yet we act as if it's a suggestion rather than a command. In Matthew 6, Jesus is the one speaking, and at the end of verse 30 He says, "O you of little faith". When we choose to worry, we choose not to have faith in God our Heavenly Father and Provider.

In James chapter 1, James says that if we ask God for something, He will give it to us liberally. Therefore, when Jesus tells us not to worry about food or clothes or anything else we may consider to be a "necessity", we can understand that because we know that God will abundantly provide for our needs.

Sometimes, though, we just don't believe it. What? You think that's a bit harsh? Well when we choose to worry over something, it sure seems like we don't believe that God will provide. It sure seems like we think we can do a better job controlling something than God can. I only say it like this because I am guilty of feeling and acting this way.

Stan Butt, Jr. went on to say,

"Worry steals today's effectiveness. If you're worrying about yesterday and tomorrow, you're likely missing the opportunities to serve others today." 

That quote hit me right between the eyes. How many times have I been guilty of neglecting something I could do to serve the Lord because I was too busy worrying and agonizing over what could be's and what might have been's. In case you are guilty of letting worry creep into your life and set up shop, I've decided to provide you with the outline that Mr. Stan gave to us.

He said from the outset that you cannot simply stop worrying: you have to replace worry with something else. Basically, worry is a habit. And to break the habit, we have to put something in it's place. Here are his list of 5 suggestions for conquering worry, and a few thoughts of my own to help it makes sense to you.

• Get your priorities right. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek first the kingdom of God and all these things that Jesus had been talking about (food, clothing, etc.) will be added unto you. We have no reason to worry if our main focus is God. Mr. Stan said, "Worry is a sign of worldliness." Surely those whose lives are away from God are the ones who worry, because those whose focus is on heaven aren't concerned with worldly cares. 

• Remind yourself of God's promises. God has promised that He will never leave us or forsake us. He has promised to give us every good and perfect gift. He has promised to give liberally and without reproach. He has promised to give us what we ask. Trust in those promises! Maybe you're anxious that you may lose your job or that you cannot get a job to begin with. Trust that God will provide for you, whether you land that dream job or lose that dream job. If your priorities are right, you're studying from His Word. If you're studying from His Word, you know that He will take care of you. When you find yourself worrying, pull out your Bible and read God's promises.

• Spend time praying. Matthew 7:7-12 gives us a discourse on what will happen when we ask God for something. When you feel that you need something, ask. When you feel nervous and anxious about something, talk to God. When you don't know the outcome of something and it has you all stressed out, talk to God. When something has happened and you can't seem to let it go, talk to God about it. He gives us the things we need when we ask for them. So if you ask Him to help you stop feeling like you need to be in control, I have full confidence that He'll help you! If you ask Him to give you the strength to accept whatever outcome is headed your way, I trust He will! If we are in constant communication with Him about our needs, how will we ever feel that He is not providing? 

• Start counting blessings instead of troubles. This may be my favorite thing that Mr. Stan said. Whenever I start getting worried about something, I can usually start counting all kinds of troublesome things around the situation. Usually, it's a downward spiral of negativity that goes something like this: Well, if this happens then this will probably happen, which will of course make this happen, and before you know it this will happen and BAM....yeah, none of that ever really comes to fruition anyway. And if it does, God will get me through it. So instead of focusing on all of the things around that could make me worry, I will instead count the things that God has given me. We're all aware that Philippians 4:6 tells us to be anxious for nothing. But then it tells us to make our requests made known to God, WITH THANKSGIVING. How often to we skim right over that phrase? When I am thanking God and thanking God and thanking God, am I worrying about much? Not really. I come away from those prayers with a smile on my face. So when you start feeling worried, start thanking God for all of the things that are going right in your life. 

• Remember those who have real (not theoretical) troubles and help them. The best way to quit worrying is to do something that gets your mind off it. Find someone who has legitimate troubles (not the kind we usually have that are "this might happen") and go help them. Bake a cake, send a card. Doing something that benefits someone else will make you forget about your own troubles, and will also make you thank God for being able to do those things. 

I want to close with a concept I learned from Dan Winkler in his class Life of Christ. He said, "Don't be an Indian giver with God." Give God your cares and concerns, and trust that He will handle them. Don't "take them over" again, doubting that God can handle it. He is bigger than any situation or circumstance that this life can throw at us.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Beating Bitterness

Why aren't more people pricked by the gospel's message? Why aren't there more people filling that front pew when the invitation song is sung? Is it because the church is filled with such righteous, sinless people? Is it because there are none of us who ever mess up in a public way, or perhaps none of us need encouragement from those around us?

I don't think that's it at all.

There are so many in the church today who are living with walls and fortresses around their hearts, and for seemingly good reasons. Because the church is made up imperfect people, those who come and sit on their favorite pew week after week are hurt, jilted, and angry. They are tired of people treating them with disrespect, speaking to them rudely, or spreading rumors about them to others within the congregation.

And so, they start building walls. 'If I don't make myself vulnerable to you, you can't hurt me', some will say. And week after week, year after year, the walls get higher, the bricks more mighty. And instead of keeping other people out of our hearts, we're closing ourselves off from Jesus.

You see, bitterness is a scary thing. It is a highly contagious, fast-spreading poison. It is a creature that oftentimes sneaks its way into your life, buries itself deep within the confines of your heart, and rears its ugly head only after weeks and months of cultivation. Sometimes, before you even realize that it's there, it's woven itself into your heartstrings so tightly that it isn't a quick fix. It isn't something you can get rid of by simply willing it away. It takes time, effort, and an extreme amount of dedication.

So why should we even bother with ridding our hearts of bitterness? Don't we have the right to hold a grudge against someone who has wronged us? Especially if they have wronged us in such a deep, possibly even publicly humiliating way?

Let's look at what the Bible tells us about the sin of bitterness:

"But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there." James 3:14-16

"...lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled." Hebrews 12:15

From just these two places in scripture we see that bitterness is a serious heart disease. It is demonic. It defiles us. It incapsulates every evil thing. These aren't light, easy to swallow words. These words are harsh. These words indicate a very grave subject matter. Simply put, we cannot be people of God and people who hold grudges. We cannot be people of God and people whose hearts are given over to bitterness.

So what is the Bible's remedy for bitterness? If we are not to be people who hold grudges and have bitter hearts, how are we to change? Look at the verses surrounding those mentioned above:

"But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace." James 3:17-18 

"Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord." Hebrews 12:14

Without peace, we will not see the Lord. And that peace? We are to pursue it with all people. I love the way James illustrates wisdom--the way we are to behave to be pleasing to God:

• It comes from a place that is pure. Our motives are to be like Christ, not "forgiving them" so we can use them or hurt them when they trust us again. 

• We are gentle and willing to yield. Sometimes you have to concede and give way to others. When they hurt you, they may never apologize for it. You have to be willing to put your pride on a shelf and yield to them, knowing they are the weaker brother. 

• We have to be full of mercy (which, as I've heard it stated, is not giving someone something they do deserve--kind of like the opposite of grace). The world may tell us that certain people or certain types of transgressions are unforgivable. We never have to trust them or love them or speak to them again. Ah, but peace is full of mercy. God's infinite wisdom shows us that. 

• It is also impartial and without hypocrisy. When the Hebrews writer tells us to pursue peace with all people, it means just that. We do not get to pick and choose the people we forgive, or the types of things we forgive. In order to be fully forgiven, we must fully forgive (Mt. 6:14-15) and pursue peace by whatever means we have to.

There is a beautiful way to attain this type of peace, and Paul tells us in Philippians 4:6-7 exactly how that is possible:

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

When we are in constant contact with our heavenly Father, His peace will guard our hearts and minds. I don't know about you, but when I am at odds with someone, it tends to make me anxious. When something has gone terribly wrong and tempers have flared, it tends to stress me out and make me physically ill. But through inspiration we know that if we will simply talk to our Father about it, He will in turn grant us peace. When someone wrongs you, talk to God. If it is causing you extreme pain and you are feeling especially tempted to hold a grudge and be bitter, pray even more. The more you pray, the more peace you will be given.

I have struggled for a significant portion of my life with bitterness. There are grudges that I have been clinging to for years on end. And, by worldly standards, I may have had the right to hold these grudges. I was legitimately hurt, humiliated, forsaken, discarded, and misused. But that list? That list is nothing in comparison to the way that people treated the only begotten Son of Almighty God when He was on this earth. How did He respond? With outstretched, nail-pierced arms. Why, then, do we excuse ourselves when our attitudes are different? When our attitudes are prideful? Should we not react as Jesus did, with unconditional and abiding love?

Pursuing peace isn't easy, but it is commanded. Letting go of our personal agendas isn't easy, but it is necessary if we are going to have God's agenda. If we are seeking our own will, we aren't seeking His. May we all strive to be people of peace in this self-seeking, bitter world.