Tough Stuff Tuesday: True Love vs. Tolerance

Can you love someone too much to tell them the truth of God's word? Can you love someone so much that you accept their actions no matter what kind of soul-endangering situation they are in? Can you love someone so much that you let them think that they are "fine" when in reality, their soul is heading down a broad, destructive path toward Hell?

Tolerance is defined as "a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions, practices, etc. differ from one's own." Simply put: what you do doesn't matter to me even if I wouldn't want it for myself.

 1 Peter 4:8 tells us:

"And above all things have fervent love for one another, for 'love will cover a multitude of sins.'"

This doesn't mean that love sweeps things under the rug; that love makes wrongs right. This doesn't mean that my love for you prohibits me from telling you when you've done something wrong. Quite the opposite, really.

James 5:19-20 says:

"Brethren, if anyone among you wanders from the truth, and someone turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save a soul from death and cover a multitude of sins."

When we turn our brothers and sisters (and the world!) away from their sins, we cover those sins. We have saved those people. Now, we know that it is not our blood that saves, but Jesus'. We know that it is not our power that saves, but the power of the gospel. Still, James says that if we turn someone back to the truth, we cover a multitude of sins.

It's interesting to me that the same phrase is used in both James and 1 Peter. If we put those together, we see a beautiful picture of what true love actually is: when a brother has wandered away from the truth (what God wants/expects/has commanded) and we tell them about it and encourage them to come home, we will save that person from a multitude of their sins because we loved them enough to help.

If we truly loved the world and our wayward brothers and sisters in Christ as we are commanded, we would be helping people out of their sins. We would be sharing the truth with them, because the truth is the only thing that can set them free from their sins (John 8:32). We wouldn't be allowing people to continue in their sins, all the while assuring them that God loves them anyway. No, we would be telling them that God loves them SO much that He sent Jesus to die for them so that He could wash away those sins.

Look back to the definition of tolerance. To tolerate means to have a permissive attitude. As Christians, we cannot be people who tolerate things that God has said will send people to eternal punishment! We must love every single person on this planet enough to tell them what they must do to escape wrath and condemnation. When I disagree with a certain belief or lifestyle or habit, it is never because I hate the individual who is practicing such a thing. On the contrary! It is because I love that person so much and care for their soul so much that I don't want them to perish in the eternal fire that God has promised will consume those who practice such things!

Ephesians 4:15 admonishes us to 'speak the truth in love'. Unless we are equally speaking truth and speaking it in love, we are failing the lost of this world and we are failing Jesus Christ. We will never win people over for Christ if we are not showing them the love of the Father, and we will never cover a multitude of sins if we fail to show people the error of their ways.

Today, it is my prayer that I will love people in the right way. I pray that I will love others enough to tell them that God has sent His Son for them so that they can be free from the bondage of sin, and that I will convey that truth in a way that cannot be mistaken for anything other than true love and concern.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Deny Self

For those of you who have known me for a while, you know that my favorite drink in the entire world is Diet Coke. To me, there is nothing better than a large fountain Diet Coke from McDonald's in their styrofoam cups. I'm salivating just thinking about it. But here's the deal: it has been 42 days since my last Diet Coke. That is a HUGE deal. And let me tell you, it hasn't been easy. Those first few days were especially tough, and now it's only every now and then that I really miss them.

It's a lighthearted example, but an example of denying yourself nonetheless. I love Diet Coke, a lot, and I still wish that I could drink it, but I just don't. I don't need all of the aspartame or caffeine, and I definitely don't need to be addicted to anything other than my Savior.

In Matthew 16:24, Jesus said:

"If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me."

I looked up the greek definitions for those words, and the word for deny (aparneomai) means "to deny utterly, to disown, abstain." When it comes to being a follower of Christ, we are going to have to deny ourselves, ie: abstain from the lusts and desires that we possess, and only crave the things that Jesus desires.

Paul told the Romans that when they were baptized, their old man died and was buried, and they were raised a completely new person (Rom. 6:3-4). They weren't to continue in sin after they had been washed, because that wasn't what grace was about (v.1-2). As Cliff Goodwin said recently, "Jesus never came to save people in their sins; He came to save them from their sins."

When we were baptized, we were crucified with Christ. When we were raised, we gave up living to ourselves. Instead, our old person died, and now we are living as Christ (Gal. 2:20). I'm afraid that Christians have become pretty prideful, thinking we know more about how Jesus would live than the Holy Spirit. After all, the Holy Spirit has revealed the will of God to us, and has shown us exactly how we can live as Christ. Sadly, we ignore what the Spirit has said and decide for ourselves how to live.

But that isn't what the word deny means. When we become followers of Jesus, we give up self. Period. Just because I think it would be nice if all people were in heaven--regardless of how much sin they have allowed in their life-- doesn't mean that's the way Jesus meant it. Jesus said that the way would be narrow--which seems to suggest that there are going to be some guidelines as to who will be in heaven and who will not (Matt. 7:13-14, Luke 13:24).

I may think that all people who simply ask Jesus into their hearts should be saved, but Jesus said that it would be those who believed and were baptized that would be saved (Mark 16:16).

I may think that drinking and partying and getting drunk takes the edge off, and participating in such a trivial matter won't jeopardize my soul, but the Bible shows us otherwise (1 Cor. 6:10).

I may think that God doesn't care who I marry, even if that person is of the same sex, because God loves all people and wants all people to be happy, but God's inspired Word has told us otherwise (1 Cor. 6:9-10, 1 Tim. 1:10).

Regardless of what I think, I am not God. I do not get to decide what is good and true. I do not get to judge who does or does not get to go to heaven. What I do know is that God wants all men to be saved and to live with Him in heaven (1 Tim. 2:4). However, for any of us to be candidates for salvation, we must submit to the terms God has put in place. We aren't the ones offering salvation, so we don't get to decide the terms. Instead, we get to deny ourselves and put on Christ. Once we have put on Christ (through baptism--Gal 3:27), we go back to what Galatians 2:20 says,

"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."

If I weren't a Christian, I probably wouldn't guard my tongue as closely as I do. I would probably gossip more, and lie to get myself out of trouble. If I weren't a Christian, I probably wouldn't wake up early on Sundays. If I weren't a Christian, I would probably wear immodest clothing--because it's hot in Tennessee in the summertime! If I weren't a Christian, I would probably go off on people who make me angry, because they deserve to be treated the way they treat me.

However, because I am a Christian, I must respond how Jesus would respond. I must say things that Jesus would say. And, I must do the things that Jesus has said. I have to abstain from my fleshly, worldly desires because I am His. And, if your struggle is anger--you have to control it because you are now living as Christ. If your struggle is using profanity--you have to control it because you are speaking as Christ. If your struggle is with pornography--you have to abstain because you are now Christ's. If your struggle is with homosexuality--you have to abstain because God has said that is unacceptable.

We all struggle. We are all sinners. But if we are going to be true followers of Christ, we must all deny ourselves--of whatever ungodly desire it is that Satan has set before us. My struggle may be different than yours, but that doesn't give me the right to judge you. Your struggle may be different than mine, but that doesn't give you the right to give in to yours and claim that God wants you to do whatever you want. Jesus Christ told us, from His very lips, that we are to deny ourselves. For some, it may be easier. For some, the struggle may be much harder. But we know that God does not put on us more than we can bear (1 Cor. 10:13).

Denying yourself is hard, though. So we need patience and understanding and love from our brothers and sisters whose struggles are different than our own. But, we must not be so prideful to think that because our struggle is different or becoming more widely accepted that God will allow us to continue in sin. All Christians are required to deny self. All Christians are required to live as Christ.

It is my prayer that I will be more empathetic and loving toward those with different, sometimes harder struggles than my own, and that I will not be so prideful to think that I know better than God what constitutes as sin and what does not. Perhaps we can all pray this prayer together.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Prejudice

Last week we talked about homosexuality and our response to it. If you missed it, you can check it out here. This week, as a sort of follow up, I think we need to examine a problem...a problem with our hearts.

We know that God shows no partiality (Rom. 2:11). Why then do we, as Christians, show partiality and prejudice toward certain sins? I am by no means saying that we should ever accept sin in our lives or the lives of other people claiming to be God's children. We should never revel in the fact that we have sin in our lives, but should instead confess that we have sin (1 John 1:9) and do as Jesus commanded the woman caught in adultery, "Go and sin no more" (John 8:11). We should, however, treat all sin the same: as something that separates us from God. No sin should be classified as better or worse than another.

We should hate all sin. We cannot love God and love [practicing] sin, too (Mt. 6:24). To be a true child of God's, we have to constantly try to abstain from sin and keep ourselves unspotted from the world (James 1:27). Just because we know that Jesus' blood cleanses us, does that mean we should keep on sinning? I think Paul covered that pretty well in Romans 6. When we put on our Savior in baptism, we die to our previous sins and no longer live in them (v 2). That goes for all sin.

A lot of Christians want to bash the sin of homosexuality. How consistent is that, when some of our favorite TV shows portray womanizers, adulterers, fornicators, murderers, and the like? We want to bash the sins that we don't struggle with, yet when it comes to something like breaking the speeding laws or illegally downloading music, we want to look the other way. Christians, it shouldn't be this way!

Is it ok to be partial to certain sins and consider them 'lesser sins' simply because everyone is involved with them? We know the answer is no. If we are truly trying to walk in the light as He is in the light, we are going to put off all kinds of sins. The 'little stuff' and the 'big stuff'. The 'hard stuff' and the 'easy stuff'. If we want to get to heaven, we have to stop making the sins in our own lives small and blowing the sins of others out of proportion. Jesus condemns such actions (Mt. 7:3-5).

I think it's a heart problem, and one that I struggle with on a regular basis. Our hearts are filled with prejudice. We are all different and no doubt have different prejudices. Some of us may be prejudiced toward certain types of individuals, others toward certain types of sins--the possibilities are endless. As God's people, we need to rid our lives and our hearts of prejudice. We need to see people as souls, regardless of their circumstances or the sins that they are caught up in at the time.

If we try to reach out to those who have not known the gospel and power of Christ, yet only try to reach those who appear 'pretty clean' already, we're wrong. I struggled with that sentence as I was writing, wanting to fluff up the ending and make it sound less harsh, but there really aren't any other words that fit. When we pick and choose who should and should not receive the gospel, we are wrong. ALL have sinned, ALL need the gospel. Take a look at the list in 1 Cor. 6:9-10 and see the types of sins the Christians at Corinth were caught up in before they were washed. We cannot keep the gospel from people because they are homosexual. We cannot keep the gospel from people because they are murderers. We cannot keep the gospel from our friends that are 'pretty good people', because they need the gospel too.

In 1 Cor. 6:11 Paul says "and such were some of you." When you put on Jesus in baptism, you give up the life you were leading. You turn and walk a completely new way. Some of those people WERE homosexuals, but they were washed and when they were, that had to stop practicing homosexuality. Some of those people WERE adulterers, but they had to stop acting out sexually when they put on Christ. The list goes on and on. When you are washed, you have to abstain from sin. Any sin. All sin. Just because the sin appears small in your own eyes doesn't mean it's okay to keep practicing.

We have to stop being prejudiced in the church. We have to stop glorifying certain types of sins and treating some like they're the plague. No sin is so great that Jesus' blood cannot cleanse it, and no sin is so insignificant that it does not need Jesus' blood to wash it away.

This week, pray that your heart will be free from prejudice. When it is, I'm sure that doors of opportunity will be opened so that you can help someone see Jesus that maybe wouldn't have seen Him in you before.

Tough Stuff Tuesday: Sinful Lifestyles

I suppose that nothing should shock me anymore. We live in a world where sin runs rampant. People aren't ashamed of their sinful behavior, but instead flaunt and make excuses for it. One such instance has made its way to the campus of my alma mater, Freed-Hardeman University.  A group of students and alumni have created a blog that features their stories--stories of the struggle of homosexuality, and the issues they have encountered throughout their lives. The thing is, the fact that this was published isn't the only thing that shocks me about the situation. I have seen multiple tweets directed at this group of people, by "Christians" that are some of the rudest things I've ever seen. Given, I have seen many positive and loving comments as well, but I am appalled that people claiming to live as Christ lived would react in such a hateful way.

 I am not here to condemn anyone, nor am I here to express my opinion. Instead, I want to look at the Bible, and focus on how Christians should respond to people who are practicing/struggling with homosexuality. I know that the overwhelming majority of people who view my blog are not homosexual nor do they have that struggle, which is why I think it's so important to focus on how we should treat these people--these brothers and sisters of ours. First, though, I will express some Biblical viewpoints on the subject of homosexuality, because I think that's an important starting point.

Let's ask a question first: Does God love homosexuals? We all know that the answer is yes. A harder question: Should Christians love homosexuals? That answer again should be yes. The problem is, some "Christians" don't. Some people bash the sin of homosexuality AND the sinner, instead of reaching out to the lost like we are commanded to do. Don't get me wrong, though; I do not agree with the lifestyle of homosexuality because the Bible does not (1 Cor. 6:9-10). However, I don't agree with any sin at any time under any circumstances, because the Bible does not.

Here's the thing, though; I'm a sinner. All of my life I have been a sinner. I will continue, throughout my time on earth, to struggle with sin. I am thankful every single day that the blood of Jesus has cleansed me and continues to do so when I fail.

But here's another question for you: does the blood of Jesus cover all sins? Yes and no. Can it? Yes. Does it always? No. Why? Because only the sins that we repent of are the ones that will be forgiven. Does Jesus want all of our sins to be forgiven? Absolutely. That's exactly why He died for you and for me. Does His blood have the ability to cleanse any and every sin imaginable? Yes. But, will those sins be forgiven if I do nothing about the sin in my life? No.

Hebrews 6:4-6 says this:

"For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted the heavenly gift, and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come, if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to open shame."

When you become a Christian, your sins are washed away. When you continue to live in sin, though, you are crucifying Jesus again. When Christians, who have tasted salvation and freedom from sin, decide to continue (defiantly, might I add) living in that sin, they are worse off than they were when they simply lived a sinful life (2 Pet. 2:21). Now, what kinds of sins are washed away when we become Christians? All sins, even the ones listed in 1 Cor. 6:9-10 (look it up: yes, homosexuality is included in sins that can be forgiven). Because you see, in verse 11, the apostle Paul writes these words:

"And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God."

There were people living with the temptation of homosexuality in the first century. There were people practicing homosexuality in the first century. But those people, upon hearing the Word of God and submitting to it, put off homosexuality and repented of it, and their sins were washed away.

After stating these words, Paul goes on and says the following: "the body is not for sexual immorality, but for the Lord (v.12)", "flee sexual immorality (v.18)". How then can we say that it is ok to practice homosexuality? Unless we pervert the gospel of Christ, we cannot.

Now here's the part I think a lot of Christians miss: It is not a sin to be tempted. Jesus was tempted by Satan and yet we know the Jesus was sinless. It is not sinful to be tempted with homosexual feelings, and yet, how often do Christians condemn, look down on, and shun people who struggle with this sin? Most adolescents struggle with sexual temptations of some sort, be that the temptation to have premarital heterosexual relations or premarital homosexual relations. It becomes shameful and sinful when we dwell on it and act on those temptations and urges. But you see, I'm not calling out homosexuals here. I'm saying that it is sinful and shameful to act on ANY temptations of the sexual variety before marriage, because marriage is the only place God has sanctioned such actions. We should be telling all people (straight and homosexual) to guard their hearts and their bodies, not only bashing those with homosexual feelings. It is just as wrong to act on heterosexual feelings before marriage (something we don't get up in arms about nearly enough!). For homosexuals, though, the struggle may be a bit more severe, because God did not sanction marriage between men and men, women and women. God says marriage is one man and one woman, so if you struggle with feelings of homosexuality, that will be a struggle you have to overcome throughout your lifetime. Now sure, heterosexuals also struggle with reigning in their temptations even after they get married (that's why adultery is also prevalent in our society, and mentioned numerous times in the Bible), but at least there is the option for marriage and the subsequent sexual freedom therein. For homosexuals, no such thing exists.

I say all of that to say this: all sexual impurity outside of God-ordained marriage is wrong. All sin is created equal. However, homosexuals don't have a license to excuse themselves from what Scripture clearly states. Too often, I see homosexuals who want to "have a voice" and "be heard" and "be accepted for who they really are". I cannot and will not be tolerant of something that God is not tolerant of.

A lot of "Christians" stop there. They say, "Amen! I will not be tolerant of such things!" To you I say, keep reading.

Am I to still love homosexuals? Yes. Will I SHOW that love, not just claim it? Yes. Will I welcome them to study God's word and come to a true understanding of what He requires of them? Absolutely. Will I welcome them into the assembly and worship side by side with them? Yes, so long as they are not practicing homosexuality and living in a way that God says we cannot. Will I shun them when they express their struggles, even though they want to do right? Absolutely not. Will I be empathetic, since I myself struggle with sin on a daily basis? Yes. Will I even be sympathetic to the celibate lifestyle they will have to lead the rest of their lives and the constant struggles they will go through? Yes. Will I tolerate, accept, and promote their agendas? No.

Would we EVER think it was okay for a group of single Christians to start a blog/website/twitter account about why they should be accepted even though they regularly practice sexual immorality by having premarital sex with the opposite gender? No. Because it ISN'T ABOUT THE GENDER. It's about being sexually immoral. It's about doing things that God says are out of bounds. We wouldn't accept what they do, even though they struggle with it, because we know how God feels about it. Yes, we know that God loves them. Yes, we would tell them so. We would also tell them that they need to repent, and abstain from that lifestyle, otherwise they aren't in a right relationship with God and ultimately their salvation is in jeopardy. And shouldn't that be what we, as faithful Christians want for them: to be in a right relationship with God??

As Christians, we need to stop being biased toward homosexuals. Please stop and reread that sentence. We have to stop being biased toward one kind of sin. We need to tell the world that we think ALL sexual immorality is sinful. We think premarital sex is a sin. We think adultery is a sin. We think practicing homosexuality is a sin. We think rape is a sin. We think beastiality is a sin. And then, as a whole, we need to STOP PRACTICING and TOLERATING THESE THINGS. At the same time, though, we need to all start helping and encouraging people, not pushing them out of the church. The church isn't just a place for those who have been washed to come and gather, it is a place for those who are still sin-stained to come and get cleaned.

I love God with all of my heart. I know that I fail Him day in and day out. It is my hope and my prayer that I am not failing Him by writing this post. I want to love all of the people He loves. I want to help all of the people Jesus would have helped. However, I don't want to excuse someone or something that God wouldn't excuse, because that isn't doing anyone any favors, and it's putting my salvation at risk also.

*Also, I know that I'm late on this one, but with such a sensitive topic, I wanted to be sure the post was 100% ready.